Pentecost 17 – A -09/24/2023

It is so easy to plan out how something should happen. Often we don’t consider all of the variables. There will be different approaches when we work with one or more people other than ourselves. Each one of us processes differently. All of us have different skill sets and experience.

Yet as human beings we have our set of expectations that we think are the right way to accomplish something. What have we learned and experienced about our expectations? The more set-in stone our expectations, the more disappointments and frustration that we may experience.

So often we want someone to do something differently than they have ever done it before. When it doesn’t happen, the way want it to, we become frustrated and irritated with the person. In reality, we have set ourselves up for failure.

It says that we have not paid attention to this person to see how they work, how they process. We have not really listened to them and considered their skill sets and experience. I’m not trying to place judgement on the other person as they are who they are.

The healthy way of getting something accomplished is guiding the process to the completion of the desired task. For me part of the fun is to experience other people and their way of thinking and processing. How we actually get there is not as important as the participation and the richness of what people bring to the table.

In our Gospel lesson today, the landowner had a task that needed to be accomplished, work done in the vineyard. He went out and collected workers throughout the day. He was very clear on his expectations and their pay. The workers also had their expectations.

When the workers first heard what was expected and their pay, they agreed to it. One scholar has said that every parable has an absurdity to it. The absurdity in this parable is the fact that at the end of the day everyone got paid the same amount. It didn’t make any difference if they had worked an hour or two or all day. The absurdity is what is begging us to really to listen to what Jesus is saying.

Originally, everyone had agreed on the wages, but when it came to receiving their pay, those who had worked more hours, of course wanted more pay. This is not what they had agreed to. It didn’t seem fair that those who had worked less got the same pay as everyone else.

Now, I myself am just as comfortable being up here or in the back row or at an instrument or singing in the choir. It doesn’t make me any better or less than any of you. The point is every one of us is important in God’s eyes. In the end we all receive what Jesus promised, forgiveness, salvation and new life. This is the gift and not the payment for what we do.

God in Jesus Christ promised the same to everyone regardless of what we do or don’t do. So then why do anything if the promise is already there? We are asked to do it out of thankfulness for what we have been promised. Jesus always carries through on what he has promised.

In this respect this is like the landowner, as he followed through on what he had promised. The workers who had worked more hours changed their expectations when they felt that they were entitled to more wages. I believe we have a whole different way of thinking and acting when we feel entitled.

Entitlement blinds us from seeing the generosity of God in Jesus Christ. In the end the workers in the vineyard received their wages and most likely had enough to take care of their families for that day. This was what their first expectation was.

I believe that we can see more clearly when we look through the eyes of generosity rather than entitlement. We are taught through scripture that we do not own anything, that everything belongs to God, and we are the caretakers. This is not the way our culture thinks and promotes.

In our second reading for today, we find Paul in prison. I can imagine this is not what he expected. He expected to get back to Phillipi and continue building the church. He adjusted to his new setting and didn’t want it to get in the way of the church’s growth in Phillipi. Thus, he chose to write a letter to encourage the Philippians to continue in their faith.

Paul was saying no matter what our setting is, what is most important is growing in Christ. Just because he cannot be with them does not mean that Christ is not with them. Christ’s generosity does not stop because they are not together. Christ’s promise of forgiveness, salvation and new life is still the same.

Paul was concerned that the expectations that the Philippians had of him being with them to grow in their individual and corporate faith should not get in the way of their growth as followers of Christ. He tried to encourage them so as not to get stuck in this expectation as he did not know when they would be together again.

Paul says²⁷Only, live your life in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that, whether I come and see you or am absent and hear about you, I will know that you are standing firm in one spirit, striving side by side with one mind for the faith of the gospel, ²⁸and are in no way intimidated by your opponents. For them this is evidence of their destruction, but of your salvation. And this is God’s doing. ²⁹For he has graciously granted you the privilege not only of believing in Christ, but of suffering for him as well—³⁰since you are having the same struggle that you saw I had and now hear that I still have.

It is so easy to get stuck in our expectations that we forget about the outcome of a plan. For Christians, the final plan being that eventually we will go home to be with God in Jesus Christ. In the meantime, while we are living here on earth we are called to practice kingdom living.

Kingdom living today is remembering that we have a generous God who offers us freely forgiveness, salvation and new life. This is a gift not an entitlement or wages for what we do. Kingdom living is about living for Christ and not ourselves.

Paul reminds us today that living for Christ is about putting Christ first. In doing this we are promised to have what we need to live. When we start getting into entitlement as our society teaches we can lose sight of what we already have. What do we expect from others and from ourselves?

We are called to check out our expectations, are they for our gain our Christ’s gain? Whose plan are we trying to follow?

As absurd as it was the landowner stuck to what he had promised. Jesus does the same. We, along with the workers, as human beings can easily get into the entitlement mode instead of the generosity mode and change our expectations.

In kingdom living we are called to live in the generosity mode which helps us to see more clearly what Jesus wants us to see. It more fully allows us to live for Christ. It allows us to better keep our expectations consistent and in line with Christ.

Remember as Paul says we are all in this struggle together to follow Christ and grow in our faith. It’s not about how much we do, but that we are called to serve graciously.

This is a special musical presentation of Whoever Would Be Great Among You, performed today by the Faith Lutheran Chancel Choir at Faith Lutheran Church in Okemos, Michigan.

In our Gospel lesson today, Jesus continues to teach his disciples and us how to live in his kingdom. Today we hear Jesus talking about forgiveness. It seems that Peter wants to push the ticket and really get Jesus to spell it out. So, Jesus did, in telling a parable. One has to wonder if Peter liked the answer.

The king was very generous, and he was hoping that this was a model for his servants. Unfortunately, that was not the case. In the end the generosity was basically revoked. 

This was a harsh revoking of generosity by the king. This is where we need to be careful not to totally compare the king to God. Jesus was trying to make a point, but we do not know this to be God’s nature. What we understand Jesus to be saying is how important it is to forgive and from your heart.

We know that there are some things that are easier to forgive than others. When forgiveness is needed it means that there is some kind of brokenness. For forgiveness to happen a change needs to occur in one or both parties. Sometimes it will only occur in only one party.

When someone doesn’t follow through once or twice and they say that they are sorry, most often we can forgive and let it go. When it continues to happen, the sorry part begins not to work, and forgiveness becomes more and more difficult. So, does Jesus say that we just continue to forgive?

If you continue to set up something to do with them, yes then you are probably expected to forgive. You can forgive, but then draw boundary lines and say this is the last time I am going to try. I don’t believe that Jesus is saying you need to be a doormat.

Forgiveness is a process. As the level of hurt deepens, the longer it can take to be able to forgive. Part of the process is realizing that the forgiveness can really be for you also. The longer that you hold on to a hurt, the more it can debilitate you.

Forgiveness is a way of life that Jesus calls us to and models for us. True forgiveness comes from the heart Jesus tells us. It is not easy and again most of what Jesus asks us to do is not easy. 

Remember last week Jesus was talking about how to handle disagreements or conflicts and was teaching about listening to each other. We know that this is not easy at times. Now today, Jesus knew that these disagreements could turn into conflicts and produce hurt and in order for the kingdom to function and carry out the mission of love they need to be addressed and healed. This is where forgiveness comes in. 

When we carry around hurt, our effectiveness to love diminishes and will continue to, until we address the conflict that needs healing. Sometimes this healing or resolution will only happen in one person. We are only responsible for ourselves.

Healing for us who have been hurt is about letting it go. Acknowledging it, speaking to the person that we have felt harmed by and then begin the process of letting it go. There are times, depending on how deep it goes, one may need professional help.

This really becomes more about our own health. We do not have control over the other person; thus it is better to go into the conversation not expecting them to understand. If they do, then it will seem even easier to let it go.

Now we may be the person who may have done the hurting. Honestly, it is easy to hurt others unintentionally. We can say we didn’t mean to do it, but can we still take responsibility for our words and actions? 

We could say well now you have hurt me by saying that I hurt you. But no, stop. Jesus is teaching about forgiveness today and loving. The bottom line is that we make mistakes, and we always will. We are called to acknowledge how we may have hurt someone in any way. This is how healing and restoration happens in Jesus’ kingdom. It happens through forgiveness.

At times we may not feel like taking on this character of generosity of loving and forgiving as there are times we choose to wallow in hurt. Our need to preserve “me” can become overwhelming if we do not choose to make forgiveness part of our behavior, part of our character. Forgiveness is generous and it is not all about me.

We have the most gracious model in God coming to earth in God’s son Jesus to offer us forgiveness, salvation and new life. We can say that we are not Jesus and that is true, but we are not called to do this forgiving thing on our own. We have been given the Holy Spirit to help us.

In reality we cannot do anything completely on our own of what Jesus teaches us as to how to live in the kingdom. Jesus is only looking for our willingness or obedience to say yes to picking up the cross and continuing his work. Today Jesus is reminding us how forgiveness works in the kingdom. Then to allow the Holy Spirit to help us as we stumble along trying to follow Jesus’ teaching about how to live in the kingdom and specifically today, forgiving.

God in Jesus Christ was and is extravagant in loving and forgiving and in turn we are called to be extravagant in our loving and forgiving. There is an example that I would like to remind you of:

1)    Amish ShooterSiege at Amish School Ends in Murders, Suicide

StoryCorps September 30, 20164:38 AM ET Heard on Morning Edition By NPR Staff

Ten years ago, a gunman barricaded himself inside a one-room Amish schoolhouse near Lancaster, Pa. Then he opened fire. Charles "Charlie" Roberts killed five children and injured five others before killing himself.

The Amish community responded in a way that many found surprising: They forgave the shooter. And, in the years since, they have grown close to his family.

Charlie’s mother turned on the radio that morning to hear" the newscaster say that there had been a shooting at the local Amish schoolhouse," "By that time she was at her son's home, and she saw her husband and the state trooper standing right in front of her as she I pulled in, "She looked at her husband and said, 'It was Charlie.' He said, 'I will never face my Amish neighbors again.'

That week, the Roberts had a private funeral for their son, but as they went to the gravesite, they saw as many over 40 Amish started coming out from around the side of the graveyard, surrounding them like a crescent.

"Love just shown from them," Terri said. "I do recall the fathers saying, 'I believe that I have forgiven,' but there are some days that she questions that."

Terri found it especially hard to accept that forgiveness when she thinks of one of the survivors, Rosanna. She was the most injured of the survivors and had injuries to her head. She was now 15, still tube-fed and in a wheelchair and continue to have seizures. They were worse when it got to be closer to the anniversary date.

Terri asked if it would be possible for her to help with Rosanna once a week and she began reading to her, bathing her and drying her hair"

Terri had heard one of the fathers say, 'None of us would have ever chosen this. But the relationships that we have built through it, you can't put a price on that.' "
"Their choice to allow life to move forward through forgiveness was a healing balm for all of them.," she said. "And I think it's a message the world needs."

How many of us ask the question could we have forgiven Charlie and his parents? The Amish had forgiven Charlie and his family to the point of inviting his parents into their lives. I don’t believe they could have done it without the help of the Holy Spirit. Not that they were perfect, but they were wearing their generosity of forgiveness and love as they knew God in Jesus Christ had forgiven them out of love.

This is what we are called to do, to live a life of generosity in love and forgiveness, with the help of the Holy Spirit.

Healthy communication is the key to all healthy relationships. I believe that you would agree with this. As soon as there is a disagreement, our healthy communication is tested. How can we continue to hear each other and in communicate in a healthy manner?

In reality, we know that we will never agree on everything. If this can be used as a premise for a relationship, then it is not so much of a surprise when there is a disagreement. Too often, it is not, and communication breaks down. There are many stories of churches splitting because a person was not invited to a party. In reality, we know it is how it was handled that caused the split.

I have done couples counseling. Unfortunately, often by the time that they came to see me, I had to interpret English between the two. I set the chairs up so that they were facing each other. Boundary lines were set. Many times, they could just not hear what the other was trying to communicate. I understood what they were saying but needed to assist them in hearing what each other was trying to say. By this point in their relationship, usually, one had already decided they were done.

No matter what type of relationship it is, healthy communication continues to be what will keep the relationship healthy. I believe in our Gospel lesson for today, Jesus is saying that disagreements that can continue into conflicts will happen in the earthly kingdom in our communities of faith. Jesus gives us a way today to handle this which begins with only two people. Jesus knows that we can often unintentionally hurt someone in the way in which we communicate.

We don’t always know their story. Too often, when we don’t know how to say something, we kidding around, and that can be risky if we do not know the person well enough. In a singing group that I directed where we were on the road for summer, kidding around went too far one day. There was a concert that not all of the group sang in as they were to upset. I told the group that if they were not able put it aside for the concert, that they did not have to sing.

Some chose not to sing. I was emotional before beginning the concert. I gave people the space that they needed. We were able to process the conflict in the next few days. Everyone stayed with the process, and we became closer after that.

Almost every time that there is a conflict, there is hurt involved with one or both parties. Jesus is saying that we need to listen to each other. He didn’t say that we have to agree with each other on everything.

Listening takes work. It means that we have to be quiet. I remember in a small group class that I took, that we could only speak if we were going to share something about what we were feeling or thinking. At times there was a great deal of silence which can also be uncomfortable.

There are times to be silent and there are times to speak. Listening takes silence for one person in a dyad of communication. It is difficult to listen without immediately thinking of a response without the other person finishing. Jesus is saying there will be disagreements that can turn into major conflicts and to resolve them we need to listen as fully as we can.

I believe we often forget that there is an unseen person in every communication that occurs and that is Jesus. I wonder if our conversations would take on a healthier tone sometimes if we realized that Jesus was there. Also, the fact that Jesus is not there to take sides but love each person, equally.

Every conversation that we have, remember that Jesus is present. When a disagreement/conflict can be resolved within the dyad, no one else needs to be involved. Human nature often takes over though, and we feel that we need to involve other people and then it gets messy. Listening then becomes more difficult.

If we can’t hear each other, we will probably not hear Jesus or be cognizant that Jesus is present. When we realize that we are not hearing the other person, it may be good time to find a neutral person or two or three that you and the other person can agree upon. The witnesses would only be there to help each other hear each other. Also, to keep it honest.  Jesus will still be there.

So why spend time talking about this? How we manage ourselves and our community of faith is a model to others of Jesus’ love. This does not mean that we will ever do this perfectly, but others are watching how we handle disagreements/conflicts. Jesus gave us a model of how to do it in his kingdom and today we are reviewing it.

In Chapter 15 of our church’s constitution under Discipline and Adjudication this Gospel lesson is used as a guide. I’m sure you all have a copy of the constitution at home. Council members, do you have a copy of the church’s constitution? All of this to say that this is the model that Jesus gave and the ELCA has made it part of the way we are called to function as a community of faith.

Jesus says to us, look I know that you are not perfect. Feelings and emotions, though, are part of you, and can often make you somewhat deaf and not able to hear each other. Jesus says I have asked you to love your neighbor as yourself and this includes listening to each other. I have asked you to love me with your heart, soul and mind and this means recognizing that I am a part of every conversation you have, whether with one person or a group of people.

The more people that get involved the messier it gets. Out of love for Jesus’ kingdom we are called to address disagreements with the person you have a disagreement with first. Try and resolve it and remember that Jesus is there for both of you.

Thus, it still boils down to Love God and neighbor even if you disagree by striving to listen to each other and acknowledge what you have heard out of love. This is the model of healthy communication that we are called to have as Christians.

Let us pray, Gracious God and yes we need your grace as we are not always the best listeners. You have given us a model to address disagreements that thoroughly involves listening. May your Holy Spirit remind us that you are present and you have called us to love our neighbor and you. When we experience disagreements, help to take a minute to breathe and that you are there to help us express ourselves in a loving manner. In Jesus name, Amen.

This is a special musical presentation of Good and Simple Gifts, performed today by the Singing Sinners Choir at Faith Lutheran Church in Okemos, Michigan.

When I think of how fast everything fell into place for me to arrive and begin here, it really has been a whirlwind. Yes, I considered my options, but I could have just as easily decided I did not want to start over again and I could have retired or at least stayed in the UP. I tried to weigh out my needs and what or who God was calling me to.

If I had thought any longer, I could have allowed fear and uncertainty to lead me. I could have also said yes and then allowed my fears and anxieties to take over. Since I have made other major moves, I felt if this is where God is calling me to, it would work out.

 I can’t tell you that there were not times that I thought about stopping the whole process. There are so many details, and one has to stay amiable in order to navigate changes. When I got the flat tire in St. Ignace on my way down to my home inspection, I could have thought that this was a sign to stop the process, but I just decided that I had to breathe and make it work.

Fortunately, I come from a family stock that stays the course. I have also learned that you continue to tell people what you need, or you have little chance of getting it. It is so easy for us to plan out how things are supposed to go and then I think that God laughs.

In last week’s Gospel lesson, which we did not use due to Pride Sunday, Peter declared that Jesus was the Messiah. When Peter heard Jesus say that he must go to Jerusalem and undergo great sufferings at the hands of the elders and chief priests and scribes and then be killed, and on the third day be raised, he did not like it. This was not fitting Peter’s expectations of Jesus as the Messiah.

Just as I had fears and anxieties, so did Peter. Peter actually took Jesus aside and emphatically told Jesus no, that this would not happen! Typical human beings, make a proclamation and basically back peddle because what was happening wasn’t fitting their plan. I like how Eugene Peterson paraphrases Jesus’ response to Peter, Peter, get out of the way. Satan get lost.

You see Peter was not relying on Jesus, but himself and this allowed satan to work. Satan was capitalizing on Peter’s fears and anxieties which was caused by relying on himself to know who the Messiah was and what the Messiah was supposed to be doing. Satan was working to foil God’s plan and Jesus was not having it. Peter went from proclaiming Jesus as the Messiah to becoming a stumbling block for others in completing God’s plan.

As soon as a plan has some bumps, it is so easy to want to turn back. We want to go back, even if something was not healthy. It feels more comfortable because we know what to expect. We knew what to expect and therefore could manage it better, as that is often the human being’s approach.

Life does not always allow us to turn back. Change happens whether we like it or not. Our expectations are not always met, and it can cause us to question the plan or direction.

The older we get, the more of these experiences we have. We can learn from them or allow them to consume us. Peter in our Gospel lesson for today is allowing Jesus’ foretelling of his life, that doesn’t fit his expectations of Jesus who had proclaimed to be the Messiah, to consume him.

He told Jesus no this just can’t happen. This is not what is supposed to happen in Peter’s way of thinking. What a switch! Peter was saying at first that he believed Jesus was the Messiah. We could take this to mean that if Jesus came to save the world that Peter was following him in obedience.

Now he turns around and tells Jesus, the Messiah, how the plan was to supposed to happen or at least how it was not supposed to go. Peter probably didn’t want to see Jesus suffer, but maybe also, what would that mean for Peter who publicly proclaimed him as Messiah? Satan may have been saying to him, you know you will not look good in other peoples’ eyes if this happens.

It is that voice that can throw a follower of Jesus off track. Peter in that moment could not trust that what Jesus was saying was true. Also, it could have been that he didn’t want to be associated with a Messiah that was going to suffer and die. I’m sure that this was very confusing to Peter.

Jesus pointed out to Peter that he was focusing on and listening to the wrong voice. That voice was creating a lack of trust which produced fear and anxiety. It caused Peter to feel insecure and Jesus was telling him that he needed to turn this around and focus on Jesus.

Jesus then turned to his disciples and said, again from Eugene Peterson, Anyone who intends to be with me has to let me lead. You are not in the driver’s seat, I am. Don’t run from suffering, embrace it. Follow me and I will show you how. Self-help is not help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self.

That is quite blunt. Peter was trying to be in the driver’s seat and Jesus knew that is not the way it works. It is possible that the other disciples were thinking like Peter but didn’t have the guts to tell Jesus. Thus, Jesus wanted to clarify more what it would mean for them to follow him.

Basically, if you are going to follow me, it won’t be easy.  You will be going against the grain of society. Jesus asks us to pick up the cross and he was and is the model for how to do it. It is not about self-help, but self-sacrifice.

This does not mean that we are doormats, but that we will have to step past our fears and anxieties in order to be Jesus’ followers and proclaim his love. You see it is not about what we can gain, but what others gain and that is Jesus’ love. The church, the beloved community struggles with this as it clashes with our society.

Richard Ward in his commentary on this Gospel lesson says that the church too often says no to Jesus’ way far too often, we need, like the disciples, to be reminded of the differences. Our society says that cross-bearing is for losers. The winners are those who know how to master the game of life and have the goods to prove it. This is not what Jesus is calling us to. Cross bearers are winners and not by anything that we have done.

The winners may have goods and the goods are all gifts from God in Jesus Christ. Jesus won everything for us that means anything and that is forgiveness, salvation and new life which are all signs of God’s love for everyone. Thus, everything that we do is a response to God’s love. So, when Jesus asks us to carry the cross, he is hoping that our response would be yes out of love for all that we have received. Jesus modeled what it meant to carry the cross out of obedience and love and now he asks his disciples, you and me to continue the cross bearing.

During this next year, I will be working with the transition team and asking hard questions that may make us feel uncomfortable. It will create fear and anxiety. Through all of it we are called to carry the cross not as a burden, but as a response to Jesus’ love for each of us.

So, the question then for us will be, as we experience fear and anxiety is, “who is in our driver’s seat?”.  I know in my journey here, there were many times I had to take myself out of the driver’s seat or I may not have made it here. It is a constant process that continues until the day that we leave this earth.

I believe it is good to ask questions of Jesus if we don’t understand something. We still may not understand it, but I believe our trust grows as we see things work out even if it is not what we expected. I continue to learn that things take time and if they are meant to be it will happen or it may happen another way or not at all.

Cross bearing is really about letting Jesus be in our drivers’ seats. Giving our fears and anxieties over to Jesus, follow in obedience out of love and find joy in the ride of life.

This is a special musical presentation of Amazing Grace (My Chains are Gone), performed today by Deb Borton-McDonough and Bob Nelson at Faith Lutheran Church in Okemos, Michigan.